why does this PRINCESS blog?

Everyone askes me why do I blog? & even though I mentioned why in my first blog, apparently it still wasn't enough*

*like if anything I ever do is "e n o u g h"

So while doing my Health homework, I was reading up on how to be emotionally healthy and it started to talk about writing down your thoughts & feelings.

Here's a little something something from the textbook.

Some people find it helpful to express their feelings in a journal. Grappling with a painful experience in this way provides an emotional release and can help you develop more constructive ways of dealing with similiar situations in the future. Using a journal this way can improve physical as well as emotional wellness.

Hope that's enough explanation for you bitches.

the nightmare is reborn.

the nightmare was over; it was finally over. she finally saw past him. she no longer cared about him or his words. she was finally strong enough to say she doesn't care. she was over it; she was over him; she was over them.

. . but then . .

she decided to let her guard down just a little. thinking it would be okay & no harm would be done. he came in & whispered the words she waited months & months for. she knew it wasn't right; so she fought & fought. then, she let her guard completely down. she gave in but felt like it was the most right thing to do. her mind knew it wasn't; but her heart was telling her different.

oh, how her heart just wants to be loved.

the night felt like it never should've ended. it was almost like it didn't really happen. when she woke up the next day, she thought it was all a dream. but now; she sees herself living the nightmare all over again.

It's 3am. I laid awake, writing this about you, thinking about you. And now, I'll cry myself to sleep.

happy? I bet you are.

love DOESN'T hurt? . . what?!

h m m . .

back to square one

You got what you wanted.
It's like we were never one.
You don't care; you don't care; you don't care.
I knew what you wanted.
A l l _ a l o n g.
But it didn't stop me.
I looked in your eyes & saw more.
So much more.
But all you really did was blind me.
A friend?
A lover?
A companion?
Someone to hold?
Someone to love?
Maybe.
Just maybe.
But you ended up being just like the rest.
You got what you wanted.
And now you're gone.
And now here I am; once again.
Back to square one.
A l l _ a l o n e.

MY NEW MASTER PLAN!

& if you see this & get upset; just . .

-Don't Judge Me-

"Unless you've lived my life, don't judge me; because you don't know, never have, & never will know every little detail about me."






"Laugh your heart out, dance in the rain, cherish the moment, ignore the pain; live, laugh, love, forgive and forget; life's too short to be living with regrets."




"& sometimes I become an emotional wreck."




"But I've become the girl with her middle finger in the air, because for the first time ever; I don't fucking care."




"Many people have told me that I've changed. But I just think I finally found myself."




"If you don't like it - then k i s s . m y . a s s ."

lovemeAGAIN*

". .I have no regrets in life. I'm happy with everything that happened. I just look back at it all & just say 'it is what it is'. ."

Is it this quote that got you upset?

BUT ALL YOU GOT WAS UPSET.

Me? I've got to live with these ugly scars for the rest of my life.

BUT ALL YOU GOT WAS UPSET.

You taught me how to love; how to hold; how to care.

BUT ALL YOU GOT WAS UPSET.

cheated on; lied to; been played like a fool

BUT ALL YOU GOT WAS UPSET.

sweat; tears; blood

BUT ALL YOU GOT WAS UPSET.

scars! scars! scars!

BUT ALL YOU GOT WAS UPSET.

"you see you can't play with people's feelings; tell them you love them & don't mean it; but it don't comfort to my broken heart; you could never feel how I felt that day; until it happens, baby, you don't know pain" - Jazmin Sullivan

BUT ALL YOU GOT WAS UPSET.

& this song - I dedicate to you.

Don't know
If you feel the same
So I keep
My thoughts hidden
We both agreed
To be friends
But emotions have risen
Wish you
Would give a sign
That you know
How I'm feeling
But until then
I'll cry silent tears
Oh, but until
Then I'll cry silent tears
Oh, but until then
I'll cry silent tears

Don't wanna be in this world
Living this life without you
Don't wanna live on this earth
Loving nobody else but you
Don't wanna be in this world
Living this life without you
Don't wanna live on this earth
Loving nobody else but you

What we shared together
Was beautiful
I never felt
Anything like our essence
But if I can't have you
I'd rather be
In your presence
Crying these silent tears
Crying theses silent tears

Don't wanna be in this world
Living this life
Without you babe
Don't wanna live on this earth
Loving nobody else but you
Don't wanna be in this world
Living this life
Without you babe
Don't wanna live on this earth
Loving nobody else but you

Cry
I'll keep crying
I'll keep crying
Crying silent tears
Oh I'll keep on
Until the day
When I get sad
That I love you
I'll keep on crying
I'll keep on crying
Oh I'm crying inside
Cause I don't know
If you feel
The same way about me
Like I feel about you
Oh, baby
Baby this feeling
Is so strong
And it's so strong
That I can't let you go
I can't let you go
I can't let you go
I can't let you go
I can't let you go

I can't let you go.